What Do You Think Life Is?

Would it be possible to make a single meaning of life? I don’t think so, because for all its worth, life is a combination of many things, including opposing moments. It’s a combination of quiet and chaos, happiness and sadness, as well as knowing, and not knowing. For in this moment, we appear to know, while in the following moment, we know nothing.

If asked to define life, I would say life in itself is an irony. A place where you are strong today and tomorrow for whatever reason, you are down. Nothing in life is ever stable; it is full of ups and downs, joys and sorrows, battles and love. Having known that, perhaps a deeper question would be- what do we do when life shows us it’s not too good side? 

If I want to write a ‘great’ article, I would proffer solutions and list the steps and ways, but because I am human passing through the same experience as everyone else, and as well, because this blog is an honest and open blog where all we do is share and learn, I would say there is no one answer. Sometimes when life happens (as we say), we just have to do what works best for us. Sometimes, it is finding solace in the words and hugs of loved ones, sometimes it is staying in bed for longer hours, other times, it is trying to distance ourselves from the feeling by watching movies, hanging out with friends and loved ones; and so on.

Religious people would tell you to pray and read your Bible (and perhaps bind and cast the devil), but what if you actually do not have the strength to, or you are just too bland and in some ways too hopeless (and sometimes disappointed at first) to even say a prayer or turn the pages of your Bible? Especially on days you wake up and all you want to do is stare at the ceiling because you feel so overwhelmed for sometimes reasons you can’t explain? What do you do at such times? The truth is I have little idea on exactly what to do, but then, if you care to know, I can tell you what works for me.

Majority of the times, positive words around me helps. It could be a pasted confession of who I see myself to be (written in good times), or words of friends, mentors or even families calling in at such crucial times to say (or sometimes remind me of) positive things and moments without them even knowing. Often times with such experiences, conversations had had often led me straight back to God and His Word, which always proves to be the ultimate and about all I need to live a strengthened life. 

Times we feel bland about life, a few times, all we might need for the moment might just be a round of rests, as it could be our bodies reacting to prior stressful and restless moments we’ve had. Sometimes as well, journaling or finding the courage to do what we love or what we must do (for instance- keeping our appointments for the day such as going to work, seeing a friend outdoor etc) might serve as a therapy. Notwithstanding, whatever works for you (that is moral), I would say do, but then most especially, I would want to leave us with this quote:

"Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble.  A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken." Ecclesiastes 4:9,10,12 (NLT)

We sometimes err in life and stay neck-deep in our issues (and sometimes loneliness) because we are so used to walking alone and we have no such person that can pull us up, especially times as Christians we have little zeal to pray and read our Bibles.

Since this is life and life is made up of people, I would say a ‘Jonathan’ is always needed to help 'a David' in times of trouble, just like 'an Elizabeth' is always encouraging to have for 'a Mary' in times of good, unusual and joyful news. As a result, a life that joyfully can describe the true meaning of life might be one that never walked alone (in the figurative sense).

References: First book of Samuel chapter 20, and The book of Luke Chapter 1, verses 39-45.

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When Your Life Seems To Be On Hold...

Life was literally sweet as a child. Zero worries, stable meals, and most especially, nothing about one’s life seemingly being on hold as it were. You had elder ones doing your worries for you, most especially your parents. In most cases, all you had to do was behave well in school and come out with good grades. For some kids, life was so sweet to the point that, all their parents did while they were in boarding house was monitor their ‘provision’ level, to make sure another one comes in readily once the old one becomes exhausted. Well, ‘omo buti’ we called such kids.

The shift however begins to happen when to some extent the teenage years starts knocking and certain responsibilities begins to fall on you, especially as pertaining to your life. In countries such as England and United States, full responsibility literally falls on you the moment you clock 18/21 respectively. You then begin to understand in bits what life really is about asides opening the fridge and seeing already bought/prepared foods- courtesy of your parents. For people in Nigeria, full responsibility in most cases comes knocking the moment you become a tertiary institution graduate.

No doubt some people experience this maturity early in life, especially for people who for some reasons lost their parents, or their parents were too helpless to be of help. Such people go through life earlier and as a result, mature much faster. But then, for people like me and (most likely) you, we get to experience it at a much later stage. We often realize at this stage that life indeed is more than passing exams and tests, as a matter fact, it is more about facing adversities and standing strong in the midst of them all. Then all of a sudden, the question on our lips literally changes from ‘mummy, what are we having for dinner?’, to ‘how do I face these life’s storms and issues successfully?’ 

Inasmuch as there is literally no one human formula to facing life’s storms as it were, we can hold on to a few ways that has worked for people ahead of us, especially with the hope that it would work for us. One of such ways would be to hold on to our faith whenever the storm shows up (whatever our religion is), as well as pay due attention to our inner selves to listen to the adjustments that needs to be made, bearing in mind that each storm no matter how severe have come to make us better and stronger.

One other thing we can also do, is to respond per time to every trickle of positivity that comes our way, especially such that springs us up for the moment and enables us to at least get some worthwhile things done right in the middle of the raging storm. Other times as well, with some storms, all we might need to do is take a meaningful break/pause from all our activities (especially for such that has to do with physical health).

Whichever way works for you, all that matters in the end is ensuring that the storms you experience makes you better, wiser and stronger, and that you never lose your true self in the end.

Till I come your way again next week Wednesday, remain strong, as well as calm (as a result of your faith, especially in God), as the storm takes its full course, knowing fully well that this is life and life is never a bed of roses.

 

Glossary:

*Provision- a stack of welfare materials (such as beverages), taken to school to supplement whatever is being given as meal in school.

*Omo Buti- A child with rich parents.


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Before You Give Up, Read This!

I’ll of course be lying if I say I’ve never felt like giving up. As a matter of fact, I guess the ‘desire’ to give up has always been a part of us as humans. You probably can remember the time when you were in junior high school, and some subjects seemed difficult; if ever there was an option to leave school right at that moment, no doubt you would have left. Same with the times our parent would have to wake us up from our ‘interesting’ sleep, all because it was time to go to school. But then, looking back now, if ever all that had happened, what would have become of you (us)?

Over time, life I have discovered is full of seasons, and of course times. And like King Solomon- one of the wisest men who ever lived once said- there is indeed time for everything; a time to plant, as well as a time to harvest. I have also discovered that paradoxes make up for a happy and fulfilled life. In the sense that to harvest, we would have to plant. We do not ‘harvest’ to harvest, instead we plant to harvest. Hence majority of the time, contradictory (or better still- opposite) actions often lead to fulfilling results in life.

A look at the time we would have been happy had our parents told us to leave school due to the difficult subjects (and perhaps teachers) experienced at the time, would we have been happy looking back? 

No doubt the children back then would have used us as examples (especially to their parents), thinking we were living the best lives at the time, but then looking back today, guess who will be happy? The ones who stayed through it all, finished all the algebras and calculus as it were, and now live a better life because passing their mathematics and other subjects made it easy for them to further their education, which now makes them work in oil companies, banks, engineering firms, hospitals, law firms and the likes.

Without making this piece of encouragement a long one, I would like to implore us to hold on, especially through the seeming trials and hardships; for all things in the end if we do not stop holding on would work together for our good. This is life, and (sadly) nothing great comes without a price to pay, so hold on brother, hold on sister, through it all. This too will end in joy if you do not give up, if you keep the faith, and as well, do all your best to be diligent through it all.

Much love.


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How Unique Are You?

Good morning and Eid Mubarak to my Muslim friends and readers all over the world. I hope we all are enjoying the holiday (especially in countries like Nigeria where the holiday is a bank holiday)?

While writing the piece that should have been for today, I stumbled across an article I wrote for Bella Naija a couple of years ago and thought to share. But then, before I share the article, I would like to ask a few questions-

1. Do you think you are unique

2. If yes- why; If no, why not?

3. How unique are you? (For the third question, ask yourself first, read the article, then provide an answer. Let the answer you give apply to your craft, business, as well as your individual life).

So, on to the article, here we go:

At a meeting consisting of different food vendors, ten ladies were asked to walk up to the stage. On getting to the stage, they were immediately told to walk back. Amazed, everybody wondered what was going on, even the ladies themselves. Then just as they were wondering, the convener of the seminar, who happens to be a man, asked them to walk towards the stage again. This time around, he told the audience to watch them keenly. Then after the second walk, he asked the audience what they noticed.

“shoes, skirts, make-up…” they all echoed.

For the last and final time, he told these ladies to walk again. But this time around....

Continue reading......


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