Breaking Free From Self-sabotage

As someone who have spent a few decades on earth, I realize it matters not the stage of our growth. Child or adult, we all have voices speaking inside our heads and mostly, they are voices telling us negative things about ourselves. Voices telling us we can’t do things or that we can’t become something. We have voices that try to bring us down through comparison, and voices trying to struggle with us expressing our true selves. We have those voices that seek to control all we do and how we do the things we do; voices that tries to mock us when we try to attempt things by telling us- “you too”. In essence, we all in life whether young or old, fights some kind of battle- mostly emotional or psychological battles if you would call it.

One thing this battle focuses and thrives on is comparison. It starts as a child by putting us down for not having the same beautiful dress as Tessy’s, and also beautiful looking shoes, and great hair bonds. The voice makes us feel that because we do not have exactly what our contemporaries have, we are less than enough. Then it goes further by whispering doubts into us, and then later incompetence and eventually lack of confidence. It gets worse if as a child, your parents were always shouting on you for reasons absurd or unknown, even when you do things that to you at the time seemed normal. All these thoughts as little children find their ways into our adult life and somehow end up trying to ruin our adult experience even though on the outside we are no more that child we were. We become adults, but with a broken child inside of us following us all about and as a result, trying to ruin our adult life. How do we break free?

One major way I would say to break free is actually sitting down with our thoughts. What do we think of ourselves? And why? Digging deep into those thoughts, even the buried ones would help a lot to unpack those baggage that have come with us all the way but has no business being with us. Finding that little child within us that was broken and needs a lot of love and assurance would go a long way. To do this, you can write your thoughts down, or simply think about them while in a quiet space.

There might be many other ways, but for time sake, I would want to put the other way as – worship. Worship reveals a lot of things to us while healing us (sometimes at the same time). A true worship sometimes feels like bleeding while a doctor is nearby. Yes, things that are wrong gets seen, but almost immediately, God (through same worship) is right beside your side to help with the wound. Besides, a heart that worships more often gets lifted of many earthly burdens.

Does that mean that doing these things would rid us of self-doubt and negative voices once and for all? An honest answer would be no. Why? Because as along as we live on this mortal earth, there would always be forces and voices trying to pull us down, but then, the two ways spoken about in this article would help us have a form of control over the issue. The process continues for all the struggles we’ll find ourselves per time.

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